Sept 28, 2025: a decade of survivorship 💜

It’s Sunday. God’s day. It’s not just any Sunday though. Today marks ten years of my own survivorship. I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Hodgkin’s lymphoma and it completely changed my life. There’s so much I’ve learned from that experience and have shared some of those things countless times over the last decade. One thing I was never prepared to do and am now taking the time to do… is the grieving process.

Grief for losing the sense of normalcy I had then.

Grief for the hopes and dreams I placed on hold.

Grief for the relationships that supported me then now wishing the cancer would come back to me.

My funniest comment was from someone I’ve never met who told me to “fix my perm.” 🤣 A few things about this: when I was growing up, I used to HATE my curly hair. I thought straightening my hair would make me seem more mature. I was in such a rush to grow up. It was soon right after my first round of chemotherapy that my hair started falling out in clumps. I ultimately decided to shave my head and rock the “Tommy Pickles” hairstyle. Since then, I’ve grown it out. I’ve colored many different colors (pink, purple, blue to name a few). I’ve had an undercut. I’ve had to grow out that undercut. I’ve maintained my side shave since 2019. It will always serve as my reminder for everything I’ve gone through. It signifies the struggles of a cancer diagnosis and the insecurities faced by MILLIONS that lose their hair due to treatment. I’ve adopted my current hair are routine from a waitress at a Red Robin in Jacksonville, FL and have embracing my curls ever since. This isn’t a perm. It’s not even my natural hair. It’s my chemo hair. They’re my curls from chemo that I’ve grown, altered, colored, cut, buzzed, etc. It’s MINE. And I’ve finally fallen in love with that about myself.

To the people who wonder if I’m still here, yes I am. To the people who wish for it to make its return, you have some unsettled business that you’ve yet to find your peace on. In Jesus’ name, I pray for you each.

So while my past has been haunting, and some parts of who I am today are a little embarrassing, and what happens tomorrow or even next week terrifies me, I know Jesus has my back. He is my Lord and Savior. He was then. He is now. He will be forever.

Ephesians 3:19-21

Until next time, I’ll leave here with three things that make me happy:

Impromptu weddings, listening to my child laugh, stepping on that crunch leaf in the fall.

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨